Wednesday, October 6, 2010

winter fun

For those of you who read the post on stroller shopping, you will feel my pain when I say . . .

Yoda needs a snowsuit.

And despite the fact that there are a thousand and one reasons that I love Rico, I would rather eat the contents at the bottom of Punk's backpack than go online shopping with my baby daddy.

Allow me to preface this by telling you, that I had already selected a perfectly acceptable baby bunting about three weeks ago.  Of course, I didn't have nearly as many stipulations as Rico. My only criteria was that it not be overly warm, and that for the love of God, the hood did not have ears. Now I will admit that the latter proved to be more difficult than it would seem.  Apparently everyone from Baby GAP to Walmart is under the false impression that I want my newborn to look like a dollar store plush toy  every time we venture into the great outdoors. Of the three suits I found that did not have teddy bear ears attached to the hood, one had long dangly rabbit ears, another had a padded head and icing stripes to make your baby look like "a sweet gingerbread darling", and the third gives the impression that Snoopy is actually barfing your baby's face right out into the harsh midwestern elements.


But I digress, this post is about Rico's hangups - not mine.

So, despite the fact that my sweet little fleece suit could be delivered to our doorstep in less than a week for under thirty bucks, Rico just had to "research"  to "make sure there wasn't something better."

And of course, there was.

He was pretty sure that he didn't want a wrap after all.  He wanted a zipper.  No wait - he wanted two zippers.  And he wanted it to be super warm - but not so thick that we can't still stuff her into the Baby Bjorn and go for a midwinter hike. It needed foot coverings - and they had to be foot shaped - not straight, because he is not talking his baby out in public with stumps for legs. And god forbid it had the jester tassles, because "That is not how our baby dresses - she'll look like a fool."

This suit should not be too warm when we're just hanging out, but still keep her warm even at 20 below.  After pointing out the fact that I am not taking our baby out in sub-arctic temperatures, I offered to have her hosed down with self-adhesive insulation foam, and just leave her until mid-March. He seemed to consider it, but then decided the color just didn't match her skin tone, and went back to obsessing.

I tried to explain that we did not need the Patagonia infant snow suit.  Though I'm sure it's a steal at $124.95 and warmth up to 60 below, I have no intention of letting Yoda snowboard the mountains of Argentina, or hike the Appalachain trail this winter.  (Though with the stroller we purchased, it is certainly within our capabilities.)

Needless to say, the child still has no winter coverings.  The upside is that it's mid-October and the weather is still in the 60's.  The downside:

She's also gonna need a hat . . . .

6 comments:

Jamie Willow said...

hahaha! oh man! sounds complicated any way you slice it :)

I recently walked by some snow suits and thought to myself how happy I am to be in such a mild climate currently...January in MN is the one thing I do NOT miss about my old home...

good luck with the hat :)

Melanie said...

Um, I have a perfectly acceptable pile of Ruby's barely worn winter wear if you're interetsed.....

The Rapp's said...

I found a cute, simple, non-ear hooded one for Axel at gander mountain when he was that age. I hate the ear's also! Why do some many things have ear hoods?

j said...

M - yes please! Especially if they are warm to negative 60.

Oh - and only if the cloth used is from self sustaining Bamboo, grown in an organic field in Bahrain.

The material should be handwoven by orphaned virgin snow monkeys from South-central Asia.

And the cloth should be cut by the teeth of free-range nurse sharks who were displaced by the BP oil spill.

Other than that, he'll accept just about anything - unless it has stubs for feet.

(But seriously - yes)

Anonymous said...

You guys (one in particular) think way, way too much. I'm pretty N and B wore garage sale snow suits their first year. Yoda's feet won't even hit the ground this year!

~Treats

Anonymous said...

I stalk your blog frequently, its cute.

--your fave student

Je$s Brown