Thursday, December 10, 2015

movie star material

So, they are shooting a Hallmark/Lifetime movie in our town - and let's just say this:

About.
Damn.
Time.

This little city is almost disgustingly adorable. I'm surprised they don't shoot every Hallmark movie here - seriously, it's that cute.

So anyway, as I was teaching this evening, and they big kids were starting their second weekend of a play they're both in, Rico decides to take Yoda downtown to the winter festival.

Our city has this (also adorable) annual event, where they cordon off the streets downtown, light luminaries, bring in reindeer and a sleigh, give away free cocoa, the choirs carol - you get the picture. Obviously, Hallmark wasn't gonna miss this opportunity - why pay to rent reindeer and carolers, when somebody else has taken the initiative?

I'm teaching class when I get a text from Rico. The producers have asked for Yoda to be in a few of their shots with the reindeer. He signs the release. He tells me they are shooting a lot of footage. "They might not even use it," he says.

Oh they will.
They will.

Wanna know why?
Because her father let her dress herself.

When my 5 year old, makes her screen debut, she will be wearing: one pair of dirty pink snow boots, an equally distressed pair of ballet tights, a silvery leotard, one poofy purple skirt with trim I am not allowed to sew back on, because she likes to hold it when she feels shy, a black hoodie, and a giant red bow in her hair which must be placed on her head backwards and to the side, because "it look stupid any other way." Combed hair - fuhgeddaboutit - it's like half Amy Winehouse, half "does this kid even have parents?"

Oh, and let's not even take into consideration the sweet sweet irony of my two older children (who would ride those reindeer bareback across the tundra in nothing but their swimsuits for a chance to be in this movie), being out of town, when the one kid who doesn't even want to be in the church Christmas pageant because it's "too many people seeing me" gets her 5 seconds of fame.

At least it's better than the commercial she shot last month - the commercial where they asked kids what they loved about their siblings, and her answer was a deadpan, "Nothing."

She's clearly bound for stardom. If that doesn't work out, she'll have to fall back on her mad styling skills.

How mother allows child to be groomed for
public appearance (note professional stylist securing
hair #4752 into place)

Notice how white those socks are?
How those shoes have been POLISHED?



How father allows child to dress for the entire world to see.
It's a good thing I love him.

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